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Car Jokes
Jokes, funny texts - Car Jokes
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Two cab drivers met.
- "Hey," asked one, "why did you paint one side of your cab red and the other side blue?"
- "Well," the other responded, "when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."
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category: Car Jokes
A car breaks down along the motorway one day, so the driver eases it over onto the shoulder of the motorway. He jumps out of the car, opens the trunk, and pulls out two men in trench coats. The men stand behind the car, open up their coats and start exposing themselves to the oncoming traffic. One of the worst pile-ups in history occurs. When questioned by police why he put two deviates along the side of the road, the man replied,
- "I broke down and was just using my emergency flashers!"
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category: Car Jokes
A cowboy had been in the saloon for a long time and decided that it was time, once again to head for the hills. He walked through the swing doors and immediately noticed that his horse had disappeared from the rail.
- "OK" he said, re-entering the crowded bar "I,m gonna have one more drink and if my horse ain't back by then, the same thing will happen here that happened in Dodge City."
With that several of the cowboys ran out of the saloon and within minutes one had returned to tell him that they'd found his horse for him. As he turned to leave the bartender stopped him.
- "Excuse me stranger" he said, "but what happened in Dodge City?"
The cowboy replied:
- "I had to walk home!"
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category: Car Jokes
The parents of two boys (14 and 16 year-olds) went on a trip for the weekend with friends. They left early Friday morning and the boys were left alone at home. That evening the younger boy made the suggestion that they take their dad's car, pick up some girls and go to the local disco. The 16 year-old boy could drive a bit but was too scared. After some nagging he gave in and off they went to enjoy the evening. When they got back to the car after a lot of discothequeing, they noticed a huge dent in the rear of the car - someone must have bumped into the car and drove off. Frantically they phoned their friends to find a panelbeater/spraypainter to fix their dad's car. Finally they found one who said they must have the car at his house early next morning. The car was fixed properly and they parked it back in the garage that afternoon. Their parents returned the next day but the boys were too terrified to say anything about the accident. The father went to get something from the garage, came back very amazed and said to the family in the lounge,
- "A miracle has happened! A guy drove into the back of my car on Thursday and now it is fixed without a scratch!"
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category: Car Jokes
- What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
- The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
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category: Car Jokes
- Why do drivers education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays?
- Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
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category: Car Jokes
- What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?
- A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
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category: Car Jokes
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