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Marriage Jokes
Jokes, funny texts - Marriage Jokes
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One evening, a married guy was sitting around, just hanging his head. His wife asked him,
- "Honey, how come you are hanging your head? After all, it's our fifteenth wedding anniversary?"
The husband replied,
- "Well honey, I was just thinking back fifteen years ago when I committed that crime, and your father, the judge, said, 'Son, you can spend fifteen years at hard labor or marry my daughter.' And you know honey, I was just thinking that I would have been out today."
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category: Marriage Jokes
A husband stepped on one of those penny scales that tell you your fortune and weight and dropped in a coin.
- "Listen to this," he said to his wife, showing her a small, white card. "It says I'm energetic, bright, resourceful and a great lover."
- "Yeah," his wife nodded, "and it has your weight wrong, too."
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category: Marriage Jokes
One evening at a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
- "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
The other woman replied,
- "Yes I am - I married the wrong man.
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category: Marriage Jokes
Her husband has been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet the dedicated wife stayed by his bedside every single day. When the husband finally came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As the wife sat by him, he said,
- "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me."
The husband continued,
- "When my business fell, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. When I think about it now, I think you bring me bad luck!"
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category: Marriage Jokes
Good: Your neighbor exercises in the nude.
Bad: He weighs 350 pounds.
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category: Marriage Jokes
Good: Hot outdoor private sex party.
Bad: You're arrested.
Worse: By your father-in-law.
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category: Marriage Jokes
Bad: Your wife is a cross-dresser.
Worse: She looks better than you.
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category: Marriage Jokes
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