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Student Jokes
Jokes, funny texts - Student Jokes
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In a primary school classroom, the teacher notices a little puddle underneath Mary's chair.
- "Oh Mary!" says the teacher, "you should have put your hand up."
- "I did," Mary replied. "But it still trickled through my fingers."
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category: Student Jokes
A college student picked up his date at her parent's home. He'd scraped together every cent he had to take her to a fancy restaurant. To his dismay, she ordered almost everything expensive on the menu. Appetisers, lobster, champagne... the works. Finally he asked her,
- "Does your Mother feed you like this at home?"
- "No," she said, "but my Mother's not looking to get laid."
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category: Student Jokes
A student taking a philosophy class had a single question on his final:
- "What is courage?"
The student wrote:
- "This", signed it, and turned it in.
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category: Student Jokes
Two college seniors had a week of exams coming up. However, they decided to party instead. So, when they went to the test, they decided to tell the professor that their car had broken down the night before due to a very flat tyre and they needed a bit more time to study. The professor told them that they could have another day to study. That evening, both of the boys crammed all night until they were sure that they knew just about everything. Arriving to class the next morning, each boy was told to go to separate classrooms to take the exam. Each shrugged and went to two different parts of the building. As each sat down, they read the first question.
- "For 5 points, explain the contents of an atom."
At this point, they both thought that this was going to be a piece of cake, and answered the question with ease. Then, the test continued...
- "For 95 points, tell me which tyre it was."
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category: Student Jokes
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said,
- "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that."
Bobby looked up and replied,
- "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."
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category: Student Jokes
Annoyed by the professor of anatomy who liked to tell "naughty" stories during class, a group of female students decided that the next time he started to tell one, they would all rise and leave the room in protest. The professor, however, got wind of their scheme just before class the following day, so he bided his time. Then, halfway through the lecture, he began.
- "They say there is quite a shortage of prostitutes in France."
The girls looked at one another, arose and started for the door.
- "Young ladies," said the professor with a broad smile, "the next plane doesn't leave till tomorrow afternoon."
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category: Student Jokes
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